OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
