pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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