Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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