I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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