i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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