i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
We need to rekindle our bromance
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
