she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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