Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
