I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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