wake up i wanna do it froggy style
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
