I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
