She announced her abortion via fbk
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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