therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
