I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
If that was your dad, he is hot
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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