is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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