My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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