I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize