No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize