i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
