we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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