Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
