Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
