theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
