your thong is hanging out like whoa
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
