I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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