could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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