woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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