Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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