he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Randomize