He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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