You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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