Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Randomize
