Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
