I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
