i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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