I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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