theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
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