that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
