he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
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