is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize
