No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
