Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
