been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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