i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
