Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
