the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize