I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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