so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
