I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
