long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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