I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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